Family Caregivers: Telling Your Loved One You Need A Break

The internet is full of suggestions for family caregivers: get enough rest, eat healthy, stay organized, take breaks, seek support. Figuring out how to do these things for yourself while also managing day-to-day responsibilities so that you are rested and perpetually ready to seize the day can seem implausible.

So when you are feeling like you just don’t know what to do next because all you want to do is take a break, tell your loved one.

That’s it! Pull up a chair and have a chat about what you are feeling.

When you communicate openly with the person you love you allow for a basic human need: for connection and understanding.  Discussing concerns and sharing ideas about how to prioritize and solve these concerns can prevent misunderstandings and conflicts and may even present a path forward that you were unable to think of before you started talking it out.

Even if you are not totally sure that your loved one is going to fully understand what you are trying to express, say it anyway. You will feel better! 

Even in the face of dementia or other cognitive challenges in loved ones, it remains important to share your thoughts and feelings openly. While understanding may vary, the act of sharing maintains the integrity of your relationship and honors their inherent worth. Your words, though they may not be fully grasped in the moment, still carry the essence of your emotions and contribute to the fabric of your connection. So, try not to underestimate their capacity to comprehend.

Here are a few additional thoughts for how you might approach this conversation:

1. Be sure to choose the right time and place. Find a time when you are both calm and can have a conversation without interruptions.
2. Be Honest. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or confused, let them know. This helps them understand where you're coming from.
3. Actively Listen. After you have expressed your thoughts, give them the same opportunity. 
4. Make a Plan. Be as clear as possible about your intentions and what it means to you to take a break. 

Even if you are not sure if you are suggesting a short-term solution like an evening to yourself, or a longer term plan such as identifying a completely new care schedule, it is important to realize that your loved one definitely won’t understand how you feel unless you tell them. So, don’t hesitate to share your feelings openly. You will feel heard and they will feel included.

At YouMeCare we can help you determine what a solution might be and how to get started on a path towards that solution. Part of the matching process between a YouMeCare caregiver, you, and your loved one includes discussions about the amount of support you need. Our flexible on-demand model allows you to adjust your needs anytime. We are looking forward to supporting you. It’s what we do!  Give us a call today! 

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